so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
