I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Randomize
