Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
