It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
