his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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