are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
