i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
