I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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