It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
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