I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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