She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Randomize