: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize