Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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