Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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