normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize