accomplished twins. life is a go
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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