spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
