Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Randomize
