He asked to "fluff my boner.."
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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