Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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