i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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