yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
