I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
