at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
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You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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