sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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