i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
