Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
