If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
