i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
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I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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