She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
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Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
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Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
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