god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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