Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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