Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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