yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm sobbing to NWA
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
