Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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