i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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