Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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