What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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