Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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