I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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