she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
her facebook's as public as her vagina
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
