singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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