U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
