in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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