4 words: hood of his car
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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