You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize