I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
