I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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