Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
