hotel room ftw
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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